B E B E R E

Though I've had more luck than usual actually getting to sleep, I've noticed that the change in seasons has been causing me to dream intensely again: short, strange, disturbing dreams that will wake me up in the early morning and leave me with a feeling of dread or sadness. A couple nights ago, I dreamt of rescuing a horribly abused dog, only to have the poor thing die on me. Over the weekend, I dreamt I had a lobster attached to my calf (my calves sometimes have spasms while I'm asleep. The brain tries to process this sensation and ends up throwing some awful image at me that wakes me up).

Last night, I dreamt that I was back at camp. This happy state was interrupted at about five in the morning when Mamasan decided he wanted to get closer to me, jumped on the pillow next to me, and brought me crashing back to the ugly reality of city life. The neighbors were awake and hollering away, so no chance of getting back to my own little Xanadu. Clutching the covers around me, I huddled in bed and listened resentfully to blasting salsa music and Spanish epithets until it was time to get up.

Needless to say, I'm not at my best today.