B E B E R E

My party personae:

"You know that little box on your pay stub that says FICA? I'm living proof that your tax dollars are working. (twitch)"

"Medical test subject"

"Plasma donor"

"Surrogate Mother (or egg donor)"

After enough of these lines, my friends stopped making me go to parties and all but gave up on finding me a young professional Mr. Right-type.

(Actually had a very romantic, perfect-for-me job at the time. Was poorer than dirt, but was happiest in my work ever.)