B E B E R E

Resolutions and Resolve.

I just don't see the point of New Year's resolutions. Why the arbitrary first of January for making all sorts of drastic changes? Doesn't do much except crowd others out of the local pool or gym until the end of the month when impetus and interest peter out. If I want to try something new that requires a bit of discipline, am more likely to have this new interest take if I *don't* start it at around the darkest/coldest time of the year up here.

This was certainly the case with the low-carbohydrate diet I decided to put myself on last Summer: the first two weeks were kind of hellish not from the lack of caffeine or sugar or alcohol or what have you, but more from my body getting used to deriving its energy from proteins or fat rather than the other sources. After that, things were more or less smooth sailing*. Now that I've changed continents, latitudes and cultural attitudes about food, it's been a bit more of a challenge. Started eating a bit of bread and jam in the morning (Jam's homemade. I know because I made it). Dairy products are de rigeur.

Exercise-wise it's tough, as my being so far north here means that the days are noticeably shorter than even those in the northern part of the other continent I come from. There's also the feeling of being cloistered by the seven foot high, locked gates that separate all properties. Sometimes I just don't want to leave the house because of all the locks on the doors. Don't think that there's the same exercise culture here as where I come from either, meaning that I'm often the only non-buff-warrior-athlete type out jogging (when my body can take it)/speed walking on the local paths.

Anyway, resolutions to me seem like false bravado. This time of the year, I'd just like a Second Wind to blow through - helping me to combat inertia and clearing the cobwebs out that have accumulated during the shortening of the days.

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* All my life I've struggled with my weight. What can I say? Some of us have problems that the mere "eat less, exercise more" that we're told to do just doesn't work so well on. Like the folks mentioned here, I have to be *constantly* on my toes - logging everything I eat, all the water I drink, every step I take in a day. It's damn tiring and, if I'm under stress as I have been for the past two or three years, it ain't happening. Sorry.

I really like the low-carbohydrate approach as I do seem to have more physical energy. Noted this when I was on Weight Watchers when younger: cut out the bread and you don't feel so logey. It can, however, be a bit high-maintenance (though maybe not so much as the more à la mode practice of veganism. Been there, done that. Ain't gonna happen again.). Following a pastiche of different and sometimes disparate approaches, have managed to lose 20 lbs (going from my second-highest weight ever of 195 to a more manageable 175). Still would like to lose another 15. Am really worried, though, that I'm either not going to be able to do that while here or am even going to backslide.